11th May 202011th May 2020 Acton Murry

Pot Noodle and a wank no longer limited to just once a day, announces Prime Minister

5th May 20205th May 2020 Acton Murry

Government failed care homes; privately owned homes are quick to insist

1st May 20205th May 2020 Acton Murry

‘Can I please get a haircut now?’ ask UK

30th April 20205th May 2020 Acton Murry

‘I don’t negotiate with terrorists’ declares Boris, after first night with baby Boris

29th April 20205th May 2020 Acton Murry

‘Thank god I’m out!’ Cackles Theresa May on 3rd bottle of wine

12th April 2020 Acton Murry

‘Home Secretary should stay at home’ Priti Patel reminds nation why absence makes the heart grow fonder

11th April 202014th April 2020 Acton Murry

Discovering the danger of austerity and ignoring poverty for a generation

9th April 2020 Acton Murry

“5G is a Witch!” Britain’s morons revert to 16th century witch burning to fight Coronavirus.

3rd April 20205th April 2020 Acton Murry

UK to test “Eleventy-thousand people a minute” blurts a panicked Matt Hancock

1st April 202023rd June 2020 Acton Murry

UK raises Coronavirus threat from ‘let’s put the kettle on’ to ‘rather miffed’