30th April 20205th May 2020 Acton Murry

‘I don’t negotiate with terrorists’ declares Boris, after first night with baby Boris

29th April 20205th May 2020 Acton Murry

‘The end is Nigh!’ Scream religious zealots as ‘anti-Christ’ is born

29th April 20205th May 2020 Acton Murry

‘Thank god I’m out!’ Cackles Theresa May on 3rd bottle of wine

13th April 202014th April 2020 Acton Murry

‘Carries fury’ as PM ‘worked on’ by two nurses for 3 nights

28th March 20203rd April 2020 Acton Murry

PM’s First cabinet address from isolation ‘a disaster’ as Skype freezes on PM’s sex face

27th March 2020 Acton Murry

Panic as Coronavirus jumps species barrier, infecting prime ape

12th March 20203rd April 2020 Acton Murry

Fears grow for Gen Y’s sanity as ‘Nolo alcohol free Beer’ sales rocket

29th February 20203rd April 2020 Acton Murry

Boris Johnson breaks world record for number of Latin expletives yelled in under one minute

28th February 202013th May 2020 Acton Murry

False alarm; Escaped albino gorilla actually just PM attempting yoga.