Freelance photographers still patiently waiting to snap first photo of Prince Andrew sweating
UK enters second week of attempting to appease angry fire god with sacrificial fair haired offerings
People who were desperate to return to work for months already praying for it to be Friday, new study reveals
Sadomasochist left deeply disappointed after seeing #MaskMoaners trending on twitter.
FBI can question Prince Andrew on US soil as soon as Anne Sacoolas Is handed over, UK confirm
Trump praying he didn’t claim tax back on any Epstein ‘Country retreat’ expenditures
‘There’s the guy who cut free TV licences for the elderly! Get him!’ Yells Johnson et al
‘Bre-X-it Gon’ Give It to Ya’ as PM asks rapper DMX to join the negotiation team
President of Brazil struck down with a severe case of irony
Government ‘shocked’ to discover drunk people aren’t capable of social distancing
Jubilation as model villages are allowed to re-open (and apparently pubs too)
Betting shops make a fortune as Ghislaine Maxwell survives another night in custody
Prince Andrew praying for a second outbreak or WW3 or both
‘What is this; Amateur hour?!’ Cummings ridicules New Zealand twin’s lockdown breach
