By Tony Curram
In an attempt to stimulate the economy, Boris is set to announce several major public infrastructure projects and has confirmed his first one; the walling off of Leicester city.
When asked by a journalist if he felt this was a justified and appropriate response to spike in Coronavirus cases, Mr Johnson responded:
“Coronavirus? Absurd! This is because Leicester has consistently been voted the worst place in the UK to live; we don’t need that kind of negativity when we start trying to attract foreign investors. I mean, I’m sure it will also help lower the spread, so that’s always a bonus.”
“And my cousin across the pond loves walls, so if I build a really, really good one, maybe we’ll get a great trade deal for chlorinated chicken and overly expensive pharmaceuticals!”
Cover photo by 5ofnovember, more of their amazing work on https://www.deviantart.com/5ofnovember/art/The-Wall-550206783