Hawkeye disallowed goal after failed Barnard Castle eye test, FA investigation concludes

By Tony Curram

The operator of the Premier League’s goal line technology system (Hawkeye) has apologised after an error denied Sheffield United a goal in their 0-0 draw at Aston Villa. However after further investigation it has come to light that the operator failed his Barnard Castle eye sight test and shouldn’t have been deemed fit for work in the first place.

Villa goalkeeper Orjan Nyland carried Oliver Norwood’s 42nd-minute free-kick over the line. But after a quick regain, seemed to suffer from a bout of amnesia saying: “Free kick? What free kick? I’m taking a goal kick. Falling across the line?! Nah, I was just stretching.”

Meanwhile referee Michael Oliver and his linesmen team took this week’s award for ‘that’s not my job’ but simply saying his watch didn’t receive a signal, stating to the players:

Yes I have eyes in my head, yes I saw the ball cross the line, yes the linesmen did too; even the other team have shrugged and admitted it was a goal. But, computer says no so who am to overrule it?”

Many were quick to reply ‘you’re the referee; you’re literally in charge of the game, what you say goes!’, but it fell on deaf ears.

In what was the first Premier League match since 9 March, many football fans were feeling let down and disappointed with the 0-0 result after such a shambolic decision, however one supporter said:

“Footballs a lot like sex; when it’s good, it’s amazing! But when it’s bad…it’s still pretty good.”

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