“They were all dressed up, asking for it. Like they like to fight around” claim violent protesters attacking police

By Tony Curram

As protests carry on spreading throughout America, most organised rallies are becoming more organised and peaceful, with police and armed forces shaking hands with protesters. However, many are becoming increasingly more violent, with protesters claiming the police are to blame for dressing ‘suggestively’.

“I was just walking down the street with the lads, about to do some low level looting, maybe get a new hat and some loo roll, when suddenly this officer shouts out ‘Hey! What you guys doing?’, I couldn’t believe what I was seeing” said a protestor wishing to remain anonymous.

“The officer was dressed in full riot gear, clearly looking for a good time! It’s not me and the lads fault for trying to have a go; he shouldn’t have dressed so suggestively. I mean sure, he may have shouted ‘Stop! Get back!’, but then they always play hard to get don’t they.”

“I think its worrying people may face charges of assault, when these officers are clearly all dressed up and asking for it. I think it sends a very worrying message to our younger generations.”

The assaulted officer’s colleagues said: “We broke it up pretty quick, but it was really weird. We had to use triple the amount of tear gas to get them to disperse; it was like they had a tolerance to the stuff.”

“Oh yea, I’m pretty used to the stuff” said our anonymous interviewee “I seem to get mace in the eyes all the time when I’m ‘dating’ for some reason.”

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