Protester advised to keep his ‘I can’t breathe’ placard for re-use in 2 weeks’ time

By Acton Murry

Geographically challenged individuals unaware they live in the UK decided to form a mass protest yesterday, during a global pandemic, to protest the death of an American man, by American police, in America.

Eye witnesses could barely believe their eyes as protesters holding placards adorned with ‘Justice for all’ seemed shocked to find justice arriving to hand cuff and fine them for spectacularly breaking lockdown.

One man, who was holding a placard saying ‘I can’t breathe’, the last words uttered by George Floyd before he was murdered by a Minneapolis police officer, was advised by one passer-by to keep it for next week or the week after, when they’re fighting for breath in hospital.

“It’s all ironically lockdown’s fault” sighed eye witness Mr Stephens “I mean, a handful of the people here probably truly believe in what they’re doing, but the rest are just bored people who haven’t been out their house in weeks and would usually be at work.”

One protester held a sign saying ‘racism is the real pandemic’, which while racism is indeed still prevalent in modern society, we’re pretty sure at The Larking Herald it will be liquefying lungs killing most of the protesters next week, not racism.

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