UK saved by immigration, again, leaving racists a funny shade of purple

By Tony Curram

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Nigel Farage and racists everywhere are turning a funny shade of purple today, as Eastern European farm workers are being flown to the UK on charter flights to pick fruit and vegetable crops; the UK is again being saved by immigration.

The move comes as British farmers warn that crops could be left to rot in the field due to a shortage of seasonal workers from Eastern Europe, meaning the UK will be fed, cared for and healed thanks predominately to immigration.

“It’s a bloody nightmare!” declared Nigel Farage “immigrants coming over here, taking our jobs. It’s not right! Why aren’t we giving these jobs to UK residents?”

Mr Wilkinson, a fresh produce grower, rolled his eyes as he explained his business needed 3,000 seasonal workers; so far 500 British people have registered their interest.

“I had one person call in, asking if the fields were dirty as they ‘didn’t do dirt’. Unbelievable!” said an exasperated Mr Wilkinson “If idiots aren’t keen on immigrants picking their food, they best start getting off their sofas! And they best not look at the NHS! It’s being held together by immigrants!”

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Coronavirus has shown just how much the UK relies on, and thrives because of immigration; people are hoping this will bring a new era of positivity as the UK public begins to see the positive side of immigration.

The poem ‘You clap for me now’ regarding migrant workers In the NHS has gone viral. It shows the stark contrast of how just months ago so many of the UK pubic were keen to send many minorities packing, are now clapping them in the street and calling them heroes.

Mr Farage however had a different opinion:

“Yes, well, these are dire times so a temporary amnesty on racial slurs and harassment is fine. But we need the PM to be clear on when lockdown procedures are to be lifted so we can get back to the status quo of disliking people who had the audacity to be born somewhere else.”

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