Joe Wicks to be struck off after grossly exceeding student/teacher ratios

By Acton Murry

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Joe Wicks, also known as The Body Coach, is to be removed from post as the UK’s PE teacher today after grossly exceeding student/teacher ratios, teaching a class to over 800,000 students as eager mothers across the globe tuned in.

Confused young children, who were eagerly looking forward to weeks of computer games and lounging in bed, found themselves being dragged out of bed by their mothers to sit in front of the TV to partake in a fitness class led by Mr Wicks.

Mr Wicks himself admitted that he was taken aback by the class attendance “This is amazing!” said an elated Mr Wicks, flexing his biceps and scooping his trademark poodle hair out of his eyes. “My first lesson ever only had 25 viewers”.

Dads and children up and down the country are perplexed at mum’s new found interest in ensuring they attend virtual PE, and many mothers have reacted angrily to accusations that their attempts to keep their young healthy carry an ulterior motive.

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Mrs Dalton, from Surrey said: “I don’t get why everyone is so surprised I want my children to do PE with the body coach. However, after watching I do have some work on points; some of the movements were difficult to follow and would probably be better demonstrated topless”.

“Do you think he’s thought of that? I’m going to write to him. Don’t sit on that sofa cushion, its damp”

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